Zohara

sunday morning calls his wishes on me
a very fair land
a sinister
and a whole lotta love

i sat down and wonder
in this land of mine
when the bell rings
and the land kisses me softly
on my forehead
would someone drift me
to their homeland
and just sit down for tea
just with me
and let the cold wind blows
and threaten me with his purity

I walked around and wonder
the captivity of the water
seems to lend his drown on me
like threads of beads
i caress it like a wild cat
and like me
a hopeless wanderer
it lends its freedom to me
swinging around
ignoring time
ignoring space
ignoring altogether
that floats up the ceiling

I sit down and wonder
in this age of time and space
we have come too far
to not lend a ear to him
and a drip of blood and flesh
too complacent about
the flowing of electricity
that we forgot electricity

while we sees the nice leaves
that seem to wave his nice idea on us
we are too distant
from the big root
that connects us

somehow my fan is looking at me
jealous of my needs
to convert this artificial colours
to a dull grey

this I feel
must be it
this I feel
have no right
to dig my judgment
and conclusion
on this piece of essence

save

roses that are too high up the sky
may never come down
because they drift too far apart
from the smooth earth
guiding themselves
to a whole new earth
a few miles away
from home

water that twirl too far behind
will never come back
because they fear
they become like
one of their foe beside them
inked and spread around
like bad desires

brain that
are shaped like cauliflowers
will soon turn
their sight
like cauliflowers
and bring
endless flood from now

we are smiling
at the cosy air in between
oblivious to them
that it starts from now

I say save us
sacrifice your lack of knowledge
and dig into her

millions of tiny
cute stars
looking at us
like a piece of jokebook
made of silly flour

smile I say smile
just wait and smile
wait and smile
till the last chapter

A song for me

Let go
pull and release
let go of it every moment
let go of it everyday
at the same time
take in
but let go
let go i will
let go
let go
let IT go

FYT thinks of nicholas

Brother oh brother
what did you leave behind
a pinch of soberness
in the night
thinking about you?

brother oh brother
even if you rocket
to the sky
do you think for one second
there will be no trace
of you

brother my brother
we used to roam in
the sweet wonderland
where i still clearly
misses how much I fear
the backlash of your creeps

brother my brother
did you know
you regain my conscious
my bloody conscious
brother I miss you so
how I long
when last summer
you were confident
about her
but now time has let go
of the chase
my friend

we did not speak much
not very much at all
but since bloody when
words has been a connection
at all.

Brother O brother
brother thy brother
brother my brother
i miss you

Skin

Sober in the midst of drunk

I must be fascinated

Towards the gravity of my ink

Your art etched on my skin

For when you go

She is dead, my wife is dead

I am left with no more soberness

Less a couple of giggling

Then they come

I mean they run towards me

Like seismic dripping from the sky

Hunting my skin

I should had killed myself over this

If there were any clues of this

For this skin

Weighs slightly more than blood

1850

I just got up
and realized
there is nothing to say
hence this poem

the night has darken
the birds don't sing
i am left with
a body of empty

for he don't turn up
i am afraid
a continuous cycle
a seasoned soul

for when he turn up
i don't think he will
not anytime soon
not anytime near

and through this
odd barrier of time
i must resist
the runaway song

now my insect
listens carefully
not one word less
not one word more

the night has darken
an empty stomach
hence this poem
hence this song

her

The rose will fall from above
just like rain
and tears
will be submerged
altogether

R.I.P

5.55am

Currently, it is 5.55am in the morning. I am feeling sleepless for now. my army life so far has been a mirror and reflection in my life, how far I have grown, what I really discover about myself. Maybe known to others, but I am definitely a weak person, I am honestly still learning how to be a human being. Do you know

1) I can read a passage for about 10 times and still do not really understand the passage?
2) I am an intensively emotional person, it gets the better of me everytime.
3) I am the weakest person in my platoon.
4) the list goes on...

I try not to be negative about it but everytime it strikes me, and honestly I am quite hurt. But really, throughout the days, I have discover what friends can do to hurt you, and I am definitely disappointed in some of their actions.

Perhaps, the only picture now that can paint my words is this

As a struggle

As a struggle
I am constantly up in a smoke
more you try
more you fail

tongue

with my tongue in your tongue
rest your legs on my shoulders

Fate

I have been hiding this huge lump under my blanket
everynight I cried for it

firmly locked in the daylight

during the stormy day, it bounced me the hardest
I went to swim for unconscious
the stream wavered for an decision
but sent me onshore
but from then on
I gave fate back something

It

I do not talk, it talk.

I do not strike, it strike.

quiet

quiet on the inside
everything is quiet

A milli-second in the past

A milli-second in the past
is the past

next is uncertain

but now is lively

So happy alone

We are so happy
because it is our final day
the the final hour

lots of struggle with myself
lots of lessons
lots of put up
lots of boredom
lots of lethargicness

But I am glad I survived
with Beyond

I am truly thankful for people who stick by me all these years, I love you.

Today the shell must come out
awaits a new me
behold
you fucking world.

This is probably the most obvious statement

but,

I LOVE BEYOND.

I am notfully myself, I am 1/4 beyond, 1/4 Jeff, 1/4 me and 1/4 of everything else.

17/7

a whole new world
a flood outside the gate
and I am opening the gate
just a bit
with brilliant flashes of light

thanks Yuuki
thanks Edward

4.45am

I rose up early from bed
it was 4.45a.m.
it was extremely quiet
extremely eerie

you just have to shake your head
at the enlarging size of memories
ever expanding
ever hurting

Tim Buckley

I wish the world would stop
and freeze for a second
and listen to your pure voice
where no man can find the war

is the war inside your mind

Groove of life

She swing as high as she can
He float onto summer's river
carefully tip toeing on the surface
swirling to the swan's grace

Dreams of life lying down the pond
diluted with brush of blue
the blue clear sky
so wide my eyes can barely fit it

Still the grass waited two by two
for swishing motion to harrass them
follow by beads of pure
and more beads of pure

sprinkle me some of your beauty
I demand
I want to dance to
the groove of life

How awesome you are.

I would drink the river if I could
so you would not drown
If I had the key
I would unlock time
just to tell you
how awesome you are.

Free Grief

I have lots of free grief to night
I am sending half of them to the world
which may/may not cause an uproar

A cold street

I walked on a cold street
away from home
set foot to a place
I couldn't care less

It was a night
when the wind howled
and wanted to eat me up
but I could not care less

The trails of my grey footsteps
I reversed

Truth

Personal truth are always the truth
Overall truth are never quite the truth

The wind

The wind touched my skin just now
It was gentle
yet it made a point

I drew a stop on the wind
so that it can have a rest
and tell me where it is going

I can pack my bags
made plans
to follow him later

Tired

I am weary and tired
so is him.